Foundation Resources

VICTIM RESTITUTION!!

If you need information on unclaimed restitution please {click here }

VINE

The California VINE system is a service through which victims of crime can use the telephone or Internet to search for information regarding the custody status of their offender and to register to receive telephone and e-mail notification when the offender's custody status changes. The VINE toll-free number for the California VINE system is (877) 411-5588. This service is provided to assist Victims of Crime who have a right to know about their offender's custody status.

VINE now offers the VINEmobile app; the “on-the-go” version of VINE,so that anyone can access vital information about criminals arrested in the community. VINEmobile is free to crime victims and is anonymous for users.  

Victim Information and Notification Everyday link please {click here}

ISSUES OFTEN FACED BY SOME SURVIVORS OF HOMICIDE VICTIMS:

1. The desire to know all the facts and mostly the why of a senseless death.

2. Endless grief. The funeral is only the beginning of life without the loved one, and it can be difficult to find hope in your loss.

3. Loss of ability to function on the job, at home or in school, etc.

4. A strain on marriages (sometimes resulting in divorce) and the strain on the family relationships as everyone copes differently with the greif associated with murder.

5. Impact on health, faith and values.  Self-care is essential in the aftermath of murder.

6. Impact on other family members, children, siblings, friends, co-workers, etc. Usually parents are acknowledged as the grief-stricken, leaving many other legitimate mourners without the care and support that they need.

7. Society's attitude regarding murder as a form of entertainment.  Murder movies, violent video games and murder mystery shows are things that really can trigger trauma and grief for survivors.

8. Financial burden of medical and funeral expenses. Victims have certain rights to compensation and should seek all information from their local crime victim's advocate and may request assistance with completing the paperwork.

9. Medical expenses for stress-related illnesses and professional counseling for surviving family members.  Grief is not a "mental illness". It is a normal reaction to an abnormal event and a survivor may need professional assistance to deal with the trauma.

10. Financial burden of hiring private investigators to help with unanswered questions and issues.

11. Public sympathy and sensationalism of the murder.

12. The feeling that the murderer, if found, gets all the help; survivors of homicide victims have few rights.

13. Outrage about the leniency of the murderer's sentence.

14. Unanswered questions about the crime, such as "What happened?" and "Did my loved one suffer?"

15. Bitterness and loss of faith in the American criminal justice system and other institutions that may have failed to provide for the safety of your loved one.

WHAT OTHERS CAN DO TO HELP AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP YOURSELF IN THE AFTERMATH OF A MURDER

1. Remember that each person has the right to grieve in his or her own way, despite the similar cause of death.

2. Be a good listener.

3. Initially offer very specific help to a survivor like, "I can do your laundry for you on Mondays or do your grocery shopping on Tuesday; let's make a list now." (Saying "if you need anything, call" is not helpful if you have no intention of actually helping) Bringing food for the first few weeks that is easy to heat up or can be eaten cold since families often struggle doing the basics of self care, initially, and grocery shopping can be especially painful after the loss of a family member, as many foods remind survivors of victims.

4. Let your freiend and family members cry.  They do not have to be strong.  They grieve ecause they have strong love and it is the strength of their lvoe that will get them through.

5. Everyone has choices.  They cannot choose what happens to them, but they can choose how they respond to their personal loss.  We need to respect the choices, as there is no one right way to grieve.

6. Saying things like "Heaven needed another angel" is NOT helpful.

7. It is okay for a homicide victim to feel however they feel, and that includes anger.  They just need to channel it in a way that it does not hurt themselves or others.  

COUNSELING SERVICE

Keir Calvert 347-610-8492  

DATING VIOLENCE

“About one in three high school students have been or will be involved in an abusive relationship. One if five college females will experience some form of dating violence.” Bureau of Justice Special Report: Intimate partner Violence May 2000  

Warning Signs of an Abusive Relationship

  • Extreme jealousy
  • Gets serious in relationship very quickly
  • Criticizes you or calls you names, especially in front of your friends
  • Doesn't like any of your friends or family
  • Does not take responsibility for their own actions/mistakes
  • Wants to know where you are every minute
  • Is controlling, telling you what you can wear, what kind of job, who can be your friends
  • Calls you or texts you excessively
  • Has an explosive temper
  • Destroys your stuff when angry
  • Has a history of being abusive
  • Gets mad if you don’t answer calls or texts immediately
  • Uses physical violence (hitting, kicking, biting), even if they say they were “kidding or wrestling”
  • Forces to you have unwanted sex (does not respect the word no)
  • Threatens suicide if you breakup/stop dating

  Warning Signs Someone You Know Maybe in an Abusive Relationship

  • Becomes secretive
  • Changes in style of dress or make-up
  • Not participate in regular social activities
  • Physical signs of abuse such as bruises, scratch or bite marks
  • Alcohol or drug abuse
  • Changes in eating or sleeping habits
  • Nervousness when partner is around or when partners name is mentioned
  • Stops going to class/grades drop

  Qualities of a Healthy Relationship

  • Support each other’s goals and dreams
  • Respect each other’s feelings and opinions
  • Listen to each other
  • Willing to talk about disagreements or problems
  • Encourage each other to have friends
  • Enjoy spending time together, but understand it’s ok to spend time apart

  If you or someone you know may be in a violent dating relationship, help is available. National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline 1-866-331-9474